Words and Equations.

Flu + Fever = Cranky
Cranky = Nightmare(s)

Haha. Yeah. Nightmare as in dreams. Not a walking nightmare. I tend to dream more often when I don't feel too good. Probably because I tend to sleep more longer and dreams occur after you sleep more like about 6~8 hours. I feel abit better now. Usually I tend to have night fever fever at night, but that hasn't really been a bother for quite some time. Judging from my environment; it's not hard to see why. More of I don't really feel hot due to the big big fan i got and opted to use instead of the aircon.

Usually the nightmares don't make sense. But apparently, my mind made me think that I hit quite a sore spot if I said out something over things that has happened quite a few weeks ago. So what I recall is that I started rambling like how I wish I could to a person that really has that bother-effect on me. Hmm. Scary.

I guess its true like what people say. When you tend to be this quiet person that don't really talk so much and you like to keep things at heart, be it if its of a good memory or not, you tend to dwell on it. It keeps growing till you just can't contain it anymore and it just topples and spills.

I recently heard a quite sad news about a relative. Details aside, I hope things will get back to a better start for them. A child bring blessings. A never thought bad habit. That's all I could just say about everything else. No wonder I haven't seen them around.

I kind of made a promise to myself but I don't intend to throw it all out for everyone to see. I guess that when it happens, I'd say, 'That's what I've been trying to do this whole while'. Nothing related to anyone in particular, and if there is any, it should be related to my immediate family.

Just noticed that I keep starting the paragraphs with I, I, I. Haha. My english teacher wouldn't like it at all. Pretty much some weird hate-obsession she got. Or she did that because it tends to just bore all of us, yea?

Whatever my 2nd brother told me is keeping me questioning myself. Whatever I read is making me answer myself with another question. What is it that I really want? My thoughts are secluded and blurry for the time being.

And the clock is ticking and soon days pass, then weeks, then months and finally, the year ends. And I have to decide on a lot of things.

*Takes deep breath*

If I'm feeling better tomorrow, I'd be doing some cleaning up in my room. If only I have some manly strength to move my wardrobe, I'd have probably gotten my room painted...

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Words are living things. They are the chains that ties around people, the environment and everything else. But they are the only chains that people can control. - Adapted from Yuuko (xxxHolic)