Conspiracy

7 things that I'm thinking or doing right now...

1. I'm eating crackers while reading my entries...
2. I'm a bitch when it comes to getting caffeine in my body. *sips coffee*
3. And recently, people's bitching me when they found out that I have a blog and didn't tell them about it. Not only that, I found out some discovered my blog by massive linkings. Add the pluses that some search engines found out my blog's hideout even with the no-index-no-follow code. Prolly due to the linking from my friends.
4. I just finished 1/4 tub of crackers. So much for losing kilos in the first week of school.
5. I have tops that I can no longer fit because of the weight I'm losing gaining at the supposedly right places.
6. Yes, I have ____s to bitch about and I doubt my mom will believe if I tell her about them. I need $ in my Make-Sal-Happy fund.

7. I'm feeling bitchy right now. So, Sue Me.



Anyway,
I decided that I will do something about the previous entry posted. I felt amazingly better letting it all out but then again, after cooling it down, I believe that what's done is done and I have to just live with the memories imposed to my brain and my heart. Even though the entry was of a pure confession to the silence I had throughout the torment. Confession to the person involved as well, and confession to the person who is in the midst of it all. That horrible load was in me throughout because I had not a chance to tell my side of the story. Even if I was given the chance at that point in time, it will just fall on deaf ears.

Therefore, I'm living with the torment, in my own way.
Can't sin myself by trying to end everything because of what I went through, right?

But... I have another confession to make.
Forget about it. Even if it's a good thing.



3rd June 2007 falls on a Sunday.
And it's my 8th week of school.
I better not whine. >.<>Conspiracy - Paramore

Please speak softly or they will hear us
and they'll find out why we don't trust them
Speak up dear 'cause I cannot hear you
I need to know why we don't trust them

Explain to me this conspiracy against me
And tell me how I lost my power

Where can I turn 'cause I need something more
Surrounded by uncertainty I'm so unsure of...
Tell me why I feel so alone 'cause I need to know to whom do I owe

Explain to me this conspiracy against me
And tell me how I lost my power

I thought you would make it because you said that we'd make it through
And when all security fails you'd be there to help me through

Explain to me this conspiracy against me
And tell me how I lost my power


-------*

I dreamt that I was holding hands. Strong, comforting hands. Whoever's hands that it might belong to, it felt warm and sincerely accepting. Moreover like a reminder that I should stay strong, take a step at a time and not leap once in a lightyear.